Speaking about things that are beyond our control and things that we can control.

I think they all revolve around the fact that certain things just happen for a reason and they exist to make us who we are.

I don't quite believe in the 命运掌握在自己的手里 theory but neither am I the 听天由命 sort of a person. However I will always remember something that my grandparents say that a lot of things seems to be decided right at birth and we can't really seems to change them in our lives. I can only say 命里有时终须有 命里无时莫强求。

Why the sudden enlightenment? Been seeing and listening to really quite some things lately. Feeling sorry towards some people, at the same time I think deep down I am too gloating over some other's misfortune. I'm sorry, I'm nothing but just another ordinary human with selfishness who will also have true feelings that I can't quite hide. The only right thing to do is to spare some thoughts about people and not do it outwardly, isn't it?

Just finished Love in a Puff.

Not the typical romance comedy but still, a good movie that sets me thinking on a homely weekend.

True indeed, we began to develop certain habits after we began to fall for a person. Be it little things you do for that person or changes that one would have made for the better or worse, However, when the love or the feel wears off, the old habits die hard and they stay with us.

When would we kick those little habits then? Probably when you fall in love for another person and this person dislike those habits which you have so there, again you make changes for this new man or lady in your life.

Just like how the woman in the movie who got into smoking in order to get to know more about the man she had a crush on but eventually decides to quit smoking because later on that boyfriend that she had wanted her to quit smoking for a better health.

Changes - instead of changing for others, why can't and don't we change for ourselves?

After the last couple of days of feeling very disgruntled, today I want to gratitude to people around me who have been there to shower me with care and concern in one way of another.

Some kind little gesture, well I presume it is, that shows me that there is kind and generous soul out there still. I think it's that kind of feeling that when you meet 10 selfish people, when you happen to chance upon this one nice person, you feel so comforted..

A little on the downside is that when my mood is picking up bit by bit, I feel that my whole body is being tore apart physical. For the last three hours my arm feel so sore all of a sudden..

Gosh am I dying young? Been quite paranoid after seeing the news of the pretty 18 year old who eventually lost the fight of brain cancer!

人生无常 so LOVE LIFE!

Nothing seems right or rather, things are all going in the wrong way.

Especially hate it when things just had to go out of control. When things goes out of hand or against my decisions, I get really frustrated.

That is what I'm feeling and experiencing right now.

What's topping it off is I feel like a total fool when it just seems like I'm behaving like a social outcast? Well, I could only defend myself by saying that I'm not that much of a sociable person which totally runs in the family. And when I don't really know someone, I can't at all pretend that I have known you since last decade. It's just, I don't act to be friendly when I know very well that I'm not?

As days goes by I'm starting to panic and get worried. I'm not going to be like the upper primary students that I'm teaching who goes around finding excuses to console my poor little self. As we all grow older, it comes with responsibilities - responsibility for ourselves and our actions.

We can't always be running to our parents all the time saying, "I've tried my best"

Please give me more willpower to work it all out...