i find myself in silence, because i dont know how to laugh anymore. i'm tired of all the things that i'm facing and ahead of all these, i'm even more afraid to let go...

in fear, yet i dont feel it and i see no tears.

tefu said something pretty meaningful today when he and meiying joked on the way when we were walking down the stairs. let me quote what he had said...

live everyday as though it is the last day.

then, you ask yourself this one time. did you really live your everyday as though it is your last day? well, i dont know whether were tefu's words being positive or negative. but yeah, as for me, i never though of living my everyday as my last day, because i thought that i would always have tomorrow before of me.

sometimes, i really wonder... why people keep di-siaoing me every single day? hmmm. it never occurs to me that there's a day when i would not receive teasing and suan-ing stuffs from my buddies.

well, i dont mind having them to laugh at my sotong-ness, my usual messy hair, the way i drop my books and stuffs which ivy, fangqi and meiying to pick up for me, enna calling me a burnt cookie, fangqi calling me stupid at times, they reminding me of certain silly phrases which i mentioned before, treating me like a enunch and some crazy fellow who bears volcanic traits.

to me, its really nice to see your friends laughing and smiling because of you. come'on, im not saying that im super great or whatsoever. but its like, your stupid and silly gestures could cheer the people around you up, isnt that a good thing?

i've always know that life is really fragile. i'm fearful for the time to see my loved one lie in the coffin one day. not only that, i'm afraid that there may be one day that i wouldnt be able to come to school and my friends had no one to laugh at anymore. till then, will anyone still be thinking of this stupid BY and would they be as happy as what they are now?

enough rumblings for the day. yes, i'm really feeling weird inside out today. haish...

i haven been blogging for three days already. let me recollect the happenings again...

this weekend had been ultimately high and fun for me (: well, perhaps this one last time before mid-year comes. lols. and yeah, all thanks to LADY ying who made the day utterly special! went out with ying on saturday. having only two of us at kbox doesnt mean no fun. in fact, both of us went bonkers inside with all the songs! hahahas. yeah, i want to mention that her voice resembles angela zhang! lols. and yeah, why only two people in kbox? because the rest won't sing, they'll only be spending money for no good cause with the exception of justin wee who will probably spoil both your ear drums. we headed to town and we bought levi's jeans while i got a puma belt too.

spent my sunday over at my aunt's place. browsing through my cousin's wedding album and i saw what i shouldnt see ): headed to bugis with aunt and daddy and yeah, went to taka again and headed home with a cake. lols

monday blues. back in school means work and more work. and i dislike running! hahahas. the guys in our class is sick and well, hilarious. sometimes, i wonder are they really guys, or gay? whahahahahahahs

seeya. back to work.